I guess when you miss a year of paradise, you have to make up for it with double the water waves?
“The Ultimate Surfer” is like the Olympics, “Big Brother,” “Survivor,” “Wipeout” and “Bachelor in Paradise” rolled into one.
The reality competition show has the same bad dramatic music and rumors from “Bachelor” shows to hype up drama, challenges and a host who’s kind of notable like “Big Brother,” eliminations and alliances like “Survivor” and Olympic-level sports commentary.
In COVID, there’s been a lot more mindless TV, especially in beautiful locations. Kelly Slater’s Surfer Ranch is about half and half. His wave machine is an engineering marvel, but it’s still a ranch in the middle of farmland. And the competitors are sharing airstreams. It’s not that majestic.
For all the stupidity, “Bachelor in Paradise” knows what it is. “The Ultimate Surfer” is maybe a better follow than “Celebrity Dating Game,” which aired after Katie Thurston’s season of “The Bachelorette,” or at least they’re a better pairing, but viewers don’t know these people unless they follow surfing.
At the Olympics, we get commentary from experts that’s easy to follow, for teh most part. But many people watch the Olympics every time it’s available. But with surfing, it’s a small community, so the commentary and scoring didn’t make sense. The scores are out of 10 and are combined between the teammates, and after two episodes, I have no idea what the criteria is….besides not falling.
There are some “experts” coming in for challenges, but again, we don’t know who these people are because surfing isn’t popular in the U.S. Jesse Palmer is the host, and he’s got a small amount of fame (and is part of Bachelor nation), but that’s about it for notable people.
There are already alliances in the first episodes, but it’s difficult to be invested because we don’t know why these alliances are happening; the drama surrounding them was prior to the show and not explained beyond “I don’t like their energy.”
Will I keep watching? Probably not unless I’m wide awake and think the waves will soothe me to sleep. After all, they are engineered to be consistent; it could be like counting sheep.